You sure do "got this." Oh, my dear. I could go on, line by line, offering commentary for each thing you said that hit home. But I'll just offer a few of my immediate reactions:
1. Hugo has the word "hug" in his name. Chef's kiss and some envy that I didn't think of that first.
2. WHY didn't you get an UBER from your living room to the airport a mile away? WHY? I see I haven't impressed upon you enough the Jewish Princess rules to live by. Better known as "Taxi!" We'll work on it.
3. I'm all of the nerds you called out.
4. You didn't tell me much (or anything) about the pre-hug anxieties you were having. Please refer back to number two for further instruction from me. I have to teach you about over-sharing, that's obvious to me now. There's a whole skill set you're missing. Whining is crucial. Fretting out loud, a must.
5. You have Parkies.
6. And I'm fat!
7. We're both great huggers.
8. GAH! I love you to the moon and beyond!
9. Did I say a few? Hmmmm. That brings me back to the long Jewish goodbye. I believe you're familiar with my tendencies at this point in our acquaintance. MAYBE: Nan Tepper.
Nan, you are number 3 of my paid (wish it was more) subscriptions and Eileen you are so enthusiastically my number 4.
Eff the whoever’s who bailed.
You have woke. And breathed life into the writing part of you, so it’s a bonus day. I absolutely love the nerd alerts; all shout outs ✅.
I have said since the first keystrokes on my Apple 2 C computer dial up connection to the interwebs, that there is an inherent intuitive navigation that somehow leads me into the lane with people (usually Women; often, surprisingly Men) wrestle with personhood; voices I need to hear. Eileen, you are heard. You are absorbed into my warm white light virtual hug 🥰 .
And Nan, I need to take your Substack class, because it’s one of the huge obstacles to taking the leap of getting my writing out there.
Until then, I’ll let you in on a Nan connection.
I went to a coffee shop in Houston and my head was swirling with a bagful of worries and D@icks and woeful grief.
I sat down with my coffee at a table outside which was ridiculously closed to the side of the brick building next to curb on a main thoroughfare.
I saw someone had etched ( graffitied ?) on a large stone the word “Grace”.
I took a photo and added it to my Image Brain Bank/Photographs that allow me to nod my head at the Universal Great Grace that reminds me to be gentle with my personhood.
And that, my dear is why, Substacklandia is where I found you and Nan.
I love this! And yes, Michelle, I will be teaching the class again, soon...have to see how much enrollment I can drum up. And I love the story of the Grace stone...which you know, I used in one of my recent stories after you shared it with me. We'll be in touch! I'm so happy that you've jumped on Eileen's train, too. She's awesome. xo
What a fantastic note! Michelle, you have made my day. Many thanks for becoming a paid subscriber, I am thrilled to be #4. I'm glad you've had such a positive history with finding your tribe on the internets. We nerds need each other more than ever.
Would love to read your work! Definitely take Nan's class, I have no doubt she can help you be more confident with the platform. She is the best. You already know from your Grace connection. There are no accidents 🤗 HUZZAH and thank you for allowing me to feel heard. ❤️
My therapist says ( did I really start with that?) said to work on when someone says “Thank You” it’s a good soul exercise to say “You are Welcome”
What that means to me is that humans, this honors the giving and receiving, and the heart of the act (whatever that is) becomes a closed and complete circle that finds its place in the puzzle of existence.
Total respect for therapy talk. I like people who do the work :) And I concur on the soul exercise. Whenever I get a compliment, I generally pick away at its validity....Nan told me recently to just say "thank you" and accept it. Good stuff. 🩷
I’m so happy to read this, Eileen. So glad you were able to go and get that big hug in person - and how cute is that photo of y’all and little Hugo in the background??! You’re all beaming. I hope you can give yourself a break about whatever things you aren’t doing right now, and just give yourself a ton of credit for all the things you ARE doing. It’s not like you’re going in for bone spurs or something, it’s brain surgery. I’d be anxious, too, but you’ve got this and you’ve got us. We’re all rooting for you. Sending you so much love ❤️
GROUP HUG! (Hugo might need to consult his agent first) Thank you for your kindness, Ally. I do soak up the love and positive affirmations you all offer, they power me through the rough times. Will take your energy with me on Monday ❤️
I love this so, so, so much. All the stones you overturned, the plan that wasn't canceled, the things that went off without a hitch, the in-person hug. YAY, Eilieen. YAY!
You totally got this. I'll be thinking of you and wishing you the smoothest possible brain reconstruction and waiting with baited breath until I can give you an in-person hug at SFO (in my Wild Fang vest, of course).
Well, it's only fitting that I begin with you the same way I began with Nan, so here goes: Squeeeee! I cannot express enough delight about this get together! The thought of the two of you sharing space, and stories, and laughter, and quiet moments, and mutual appreciation is just the right kind of uplift right now. I'm sure I'm not telling you anything you don't already know.
What stands out to me about both your reflections and Nan's is how fiercely we hold onto the stories about ourselves that are the least beneficial. "I can't possibly do that, I shouldn't impose myself, I don't deserve that, what if X [insert every worst case scenario imaginable] happens?
I so admire you for ignoring all those discouraging voices and MAKING IT HAPPEN! Go you!
I'm excited and anxious for you with the upcoming procedures, but I can't think of a better way to prepare than to fill your tank with hugs in the company of dear friends (and a couple of pooches).
Thank you for telling your story here and for setting an example for how to lean into possibility!
SQUEEEEEEE really does sum it all up. It's SO true about the stories that don't serve us being so hard to shake. It feels like you have to tell that little hater voice to STFU already. I'm glad we both were able to do it and share it with all our Substack loves. And yes, her pink elephant and my pink hair made for some fun serendipity. 🩷 🩷 🩷
ps I looooovvveeed your sports post. Will comment when I'm rested tomorrow. I laughed so many times.
Six days from now, I’ll be on a beach raising a glass to you, and eagerly awaiting your dispatches from the other side. So glad you had another IRL Substack hangout before the procedure. I love that so many of us have formed these bonds In These Times. Lord knows we need them.
I am living for your beach drink! The IRL hangs are such good medicine. We do need to stick together through this fuckery, keeping the lights on in our satellite offices of sanity. ❤️
Oh, look at you two wonderful humans together. And the extra-human being in the back seat! I've missed you here dear Eileen, but I also haven't posted in almost two months due to er, LIFE stuff (not brain surgery though!) and I feel bad about that too (and have lost subscribers, which of course could be for completely unrelated reasons). I met Nan (waves!) in a Sarah Fay group last year, and loved her to bits too. I'm so happy you got to get your hugs in. Love, Jodyxxx
Life stuff is time consuming at points. I've missed you here as well, Jody. You are right about the unsubscribers, no need to overthink their motives. I'm most content with catching up with all my best ladies here, it's a 24/7 smart and funny girl party in these parts.
They really are, Stephanie. You can get through this life without much human interaction which is often a godsend, but the RIGHT people can be as healing and helpful as alone time. ❤️
OMG, this is the best best thing I’ve read in a while! I was swept up and on the edge of my seat… Would Eileen make it??! Not bragging or anything but I also got an IRL hug from Nan at the Woodstock Book Festival.
Glad you got that hug IRL. Also glad to hear you have a crew lined-up, post surgery.
My 81 year old spouse with PD (dx 2 years ago) had a brain shunt "installed" Oct '23 for NPH (same disorder recently dx in Billy Joel).
My spouse was scared of course (drilling through skull plus 2 incisions / one behind the ear the other in abdominal region for the tubing connected to the brain shunt), he made it through.
Yay for real life recounts of skull cracking success! Thank you for reading and sharing your husband's experience. I so appreciate you taking the time to be here. ❤️
Good luck! I would say your trip to Albany portends a successful procedure in six days. Stick with Emmy and Mark and you can't go wrong. LOVE that rendition. Thanks for reminding me of it.
This is such a beautiful story. I love the details leading up to the in person in person hug. I relate to situational cancel by repeat unknowns, repeat … you didn’t give up. Empowering. Inspiring. Making hard fun, your humor is a delight as is Nans - the hug in Hugo
Glad to read you again even though I’m reading backwards. 🦋🌹
Thanks for reading in any order, Prajna. Nan and I really loved writing about our experiences. And it felt like one of those instances when we really wanted everything to go right and it did. I try not to let any win go uncelebrated.
I guess it's now T minus four days, and I'm over here in the northwest corner pulling so hard for you. Wishing you many more trips to Nanland. As a person who also has limited spoons, I found this so encouraging and delightful to read. You do got this! So glad you got such a great, big win right before this next big challenge.
Spoonies unite! If not in person, on the interwebs when we're able. I do love knowing that even though I'll be housebound for a bit I can always come here and jab with my Substack fam. I so appreciate the support from your NW corner! 💜
I have been thinking about you a lot lately, wondering if you had gone in for your surgery yet. I just want to send you some love and tell you that I know that your operation will be a huge success. I can't wait to hear your first substack coming out the other side of this. It is going to be awesome. Aside from all the poking and prodding and whatnot. Be brave intrepid traveller, you are in good hands and you are loved
Kip! I am in good hands and I am loved. By the best best bestest of people. Looking forward to what is to come. Give my love to Dr. C and Georgie for me 💜
You have a ridiculous amount of strong fabulous people sending good juju! We know we're lucky to have YOU. Do keep us informed, please....if you can.....thanks.....J
Eileen, you are my hero! The wit and the wisdom, the profound and the profane, all in one post! I have not only virtual hugs but powerful energy for healing to send you during this fraught time. If you feel comfortable doing so, please let your Substack fans know when your surgery date is so that we can beam our love and good wishes to you from afar. Trust me, you will feel it and it will make a difference. Sending you love.
Hi Liz! Thank you for the love, hugs, and positive energy. My surgery is this Monday (6/2) here in Chicago. Time TBA but I'm sure I will be there waaaay early for prep and sitting around. The procedure takes about 4-5 hours from what I've heard. I will take all the warm vibes you want to send my direction. The love I get in this corner of the world could light up the sky, I am fortunate to have so many good souls looking out for me. 🩷
You sure do "got this." Oh, my dear. I could go on, line by line, offering commentary for each thing you said that hit home. But I'll just offer a few of my immediate reactions:
1. Hugo has the word "hug" in his name. Chef's kiss and some envy that I didn't think of that first.
2. WHY didn't you get an UBER from your living room to the airport a mile away? WHY? I see I haven't impressed upon you enough the Jewish Princess rules to live by. Better known as "Taxi!" We'll work on it.
3. I'm all of the nerds you called out.
4. You didn't tell me much (or anything) about the pre-hug anxieties you were having. Please refer back to number two for further instruction from me. I have to teach you about over-sharing, that's obvious to me now. There's a whole skill set you're missing. Whining is crucial. Fretting out loud, a must.
5. You have Parkies.
6. And I'm fat!
7. We're both great huggers.
8. GAH! I love you to the moon and beyond!
9. Did I say a few? Hmmmm. That brings me back to the long Jewish goodbye. I believe you're familiar with my tendencies at this point in our acquaintance. MAYBE: Nan Tepper.
xoxoxo!
PS. 10. I can't wait to visit again!
You are obviously the perfect friend to a perfect friend. I'm so glad you found one another and have made clear the importance of in-person hugs.
Eileen's the bomb!
In person biz does a body good!
ha ha the Jewish Princess rules of life… I’m living by them at 73!
Well. It's about time. Another shiksa sees the light! xo
Ok.
Nan, you are number 3 of my paid (wish it was more) subscriptions and Eileen you are so enthusiastically my number 4.
Eff the whoever’s who bailed.
You have woke. And breathed life into the writing part of you, so it’s a bonus day. I absolutely love the nerd alerts; all shout outs ✅.
I have said since the first keystrokes on my Apple 2 C computer dial up connection to the interwebs, that there is an inherent intuitive navigation that somehow leads me into the lane with people (usually Women; often, surprisingly Men) wrestle with personhood; voices I need to hear. Eileen, you are heard. You are absorbed into my warm white light virtual hug 🥰 .
And Nan, I need to take your Substack class, because it’s one of the huge obstacles to taking the leap of getting my writing out there.
Until then, I’ll let you in on a Nan connection.
I went to a coffee shop in Houston and my head was swirling with a bagful of worries and D@icks and woeful grief.
I sat down with my coffee at a table outside which was ridiculously closed to the side of the brick building next to curb on a main thoroughfare.
I saw someone had etched ( graffitied ?) on a large stone the word “Grace”.
I took a photo and added it to my Image Brain Bank/Photographs that allow me to nod my head at the Universal Great Grace that reminds me to be gentle with my personhood.
And that, my dear is why, Substacklandia is where I found you and Nan.
Huzzah. ❤️+💯+🙈+🧠+💻+📴+🫤=🤗
I love this! And yes, Michelle, I will be teaching the class again, soon...have to see how much enrollment I can drum up. And I love the story of the Grace stone...which you know, I used in one of my recent stories after you shared it with me. We'll be in touch! I'm so happy that you've jumped on Eileen's train, too. She's awesome. xo
I’m carboloading Substack today so I’ll head backwords to the Grace post.
And I have an asterisk ✳️ tattoo… but I LOVE the semicolon.
Grace is Laughing.
What a fantastic note! Michelle, you have made my day. Many thanks for becoming a paid subscriber, I am thrilled to be #4. I'm glad you've had such a positive history with finding your tribe on the internets. We nerds need each other more than ever.
Would love to read your work! Definitely take Nan's class, I have no doubt she can help you be more confident with the platform. She is the best. You already know from your Grace connection. There are no accidents 🤗 HUZZAH and thank you for allowing me to feel heard. ❤️
My therapist says ( did I really start with that?) said to work on when someone says “Thank You” it’s a good soul exercise to say “You are Welcome”
What that means to me is that humans, this honors the giving and receiving, and the heart of the act (whatever that is) becomes a closed and complete circle that finds its place in the puzzle of existence.
(or if your like me, it’s a bubble 🫧 )
Anywho…
Grace is the better for it.😉
You are Welcome #4!🤙
Total respect for therapy talk. I like people who do the work :) And I concur on the soul exercise. Whenever I get a compliment, I generally pick away at its validity....Nan told me recently to just say "thank you" and accept it. Good stuff. 🩷
Thank you. xo
I’m so happy to read this, Eileen. So glad you were able to go and get that big hug in person - and how cute is that photo of y’all and little Hugo in the background??! You’re all beaming. I hope you can give yourself a break about whatever things you aren’t doing right now, and just give yourself a ton of credit for all the things you ARE doing. It’s not like you’re going in for bone spurs or something, it’s brain surgery. I’d be anxious, too, but you’ve got this and you’ve got us. We’re all rooting for you. Sending you so much love ❤️
Amen to that, Ally! xo
GROUP HUG! (Hugo might need to consult his agent first) Thank you for your kindness, Ally. I do soak up the love and positive affirmations you all offer, they power me through the rough times. Will take your energy with me on Monday ❤️
I’ll be thinking of you and sending all the good juju!! ❤️❤️❤️
I love this so, so, so much. All the stones you overturned, the plan that wasn't canceled, the things that went off without a hitch, the in-person hug. YAY, Eilieen. YAY!
You totally got this. I'll be thinking of you and wishing you the smoothest possible brain reconstruction and waiting with baited breath until I can give you an in-person hug at SFO (in my Wild Fang vest, of course).
I can't wait for my Debbie Harry vest hug! I will wear my Wild Fang overalls so you can spot me amongst the masses. 🩷
Well, it's only fitting that I begin with you the same way I began with Nan, so here goes: Squeeeee! I cannot express enough delight about this get together! The thought of the two of you sharing space, and stories, and laughter, and quiet moments, and mutual appreciation is just the right kind of uplift right now. I'm sure I'm not telling you anything you don't already know.
What stands out to me about both your reflections and Nan's is how fiercely we hold onto the stories about ourselves that are the least beneficial. "I can't possibly do that, I shouldn't impose myself, I don't deserve that, what if X [insert every worst case scenario imaginable] happens?
I so admire you for ignoring all those discouraging voices and MAKING IT HAPPEN! Go you!
I'm excited and anxious for you with the upcoming procedures, but I can't think of a better way to prepare than to fill your tank with hugs in the company of dear friends (and a couple of pooches).
Thank you for telling your story here and for setting an example for how to lean into possibility!
SQUEEEEEEE really does sum it all up. It's SO true about the stories that don't serve us being so hard to shake. It feels like you have to tell that little hater voice to STFU already. I'm glad we both were able to do it and share it with all our Substack loves. And yes, her pink elephant and my pink hair made for some fun serendipity. 🩷 🩷 🩷
ps I looooovvveeed your sports post. Will comment when I'm rested tomorrow. I laughed so many times.
🩷
Six days from now, I’ll be on a beach raising a glass to you, and eagerly awaiting your dispatches from the other side. So glad you had another IRL Substack hangout before the procedure. I love that so many of us have formed these bonds In These Times. Lord knows we need them.
I am living for your beach drink! The IRL hangs are such good medicine. We do need to stick together through this fuckery, keeping the lights on in our satellite offices of sanity. ❤️
Oh, look at you two wonderful humans together. And the extra-human being in the back seat! I've missed you here dear Eileen, but I also haven't posted in almost two months due to er, LIFE stuff (not brain surgery though!) and I feel bad about that too (and have lost subscribers, which of course could be for completely unrelated reasons). I met Nan (waves!) in a Sarah Fay group last year, and loved her to bits too. I'm so happy you got to get your hugs in. Love, Jodyxxx
Hi, Jody! xo
Life stuff is time consuming at points. I've missed you here as well, Jody. You are right about the unsubscribers, no need to overthink their motives. I'm most content with catching up with all my best ladies here, it's a 24/7 smart and funny girl party in these parts.
Eileen this made me so happy to read. IRL visits with the right people are so restorative.
They really are, Stephanie. You can get through this life without much human interaction which is often a godsend, but the RIGHT people can be as healing and helpful as alone time. ❤️
OMG, this is the best best thing I’ve read in a while! I was swept up and on the edge of my seat… Would Eileen make it??! Not bragging or anything but I also got an IRL hug from Nan at the Woodstock Book Festival.
I think Nan knows how good her hugs are and makes them available to the right people ❤️
Glad you got that hug IRL. Also glad to hear you have a crew lined-up, post surgery.
My 81 year old spouse with PD (dx 2 years ago) had a brain shunt "installed" Oct '23 for NPH (same disorder recently dx in Billy Joel).
My spouse was scared of course (drilling through skull plus 2 incisions / one behind the ear the other in abdominal region for the tubing connected to the brain shunt), he made it through.
You got this!!
Yay for real life recounts of skull cracking success! Thank you for reading and sharing your husband's experience. I so appreciate you taking the time to be here. ❤️
Good luck! I would say your trip to Albany portends a successful procedure in six days. Stick with Emmy and Mark and you can't go wrong. LOVE that rendition. Thanks for reminding me of it.
Absolutely! I’m glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for the positive energy, I’m collecting it over the next few days to keep me focused.
This is such a beautiful story. I love the details leading up to the in person in person hug. I relate to situational cancel by repeat unknowns, repeat … you didn’t give up. Empowering. Inspiring. Making hard fun, your humor is a delight as is Nans - the hug in Hugo
Glad to read you again even though I’m reading backwards. 🦋🌹
Thanks for reading in any order, Prajna. Nan and I really loved writing about our experiences. And it felt like one of those instances when we really wanted everything to go right and it did. I try not to let any win go uncelebrated.
I hear you, Eileen. And I wish you so many more wins, especially with your current challenge.
Sometimes life feels like a victory dance.
I guess it's now T minus four days, and I'm over here in the northwest corner pulling so hard for you. Wishing you many more trips to Nanland. As a person who also has limited spoons, I found this so encouraging and delightful to read. You do got this! So glad you got such a great, big win right before this next big challenge.
Spoonies unite! If not in person, on the interwebs when we're able. I do love knowing that even though I'll be housebound for a bit I can always come here and jab with my Substack fam. I so appreciate the support from your NW corner! 💜
💜💜💜
I have been thinking about you a lot lately, wondering if you had gone in for your surgery yet. I just want to send you some love and tell you that I know that your operation will be a huge success. I can't wait to hear your first substack coming out the other side of this. It is going to be awesome. Aside from all the poking and prodding and whatnot. Be brave intrepid traveller, you are in good hands and you are loved
Kip! I am in good hands and I am loved. By the best best bestest of people. Looking forward to what is to come. Give my love to Dr. C and Georgie for me 💜
You have a ridiculous amount of strong fabulous people sending good juju! We know we're lucky to have YOU. Do keep us informed, please....if you can.....thanks.....J
There is an update network in place! Thank you for the juju ♥️
Eileen, you are my hero! The wit and the wisdom, the profound and the profane, all in one post! I have not only virtual hugs but powerful energy for healing to send you during this fraught time. If you feel comfortable doing so, please let your Substack fans know when your surgery date is so that we can beam our love and good wishes to you from afar. Trust me, you will feel it and it will make a difference. Sending you love.
Hooray 🎉
Hi Liz! Thank you for the love, hugs, and positive energy. My surgery is this Monday (6/2) here in Chicago. Time TBA but I'm sure I will be there waaaay early for prep and sitting around. The procedure takes about 4-5 hours from what I've heard. I will take all the warm vibes you want to send my direction. The love I get in this corner of the world could light up the sky, I am fortunate to have so many good souls looking out for me. 🩷
You got it - hugs, positive energy and good vibes coming your way starting 6 am Eastern Time from Southern NH!!! PS: love your pink pixie hair.
Good to read your half of the story after reading Nan's, Eileen. An odyssey for a hug, for both of you. I love that.